Do the Texans Have the Worst Defense in the History of the NFL?

For a bit, I thought about typing a funny blog post about how the NFL has it in for the Houston Texans by only scheduling the best offenses and quarterbacks of all time against it. But given some of the comments here, I thought the humor would be lost on people. That, and it isn't particularly funny thinking by Game 3 of the season that your defense has little chance to get better.

My game review can be found on my Texans Chick blog. The short version is that the Texans defense is catastrophically bad, in a statistically-crazed, all-time-in-the-history-of-the-NFL way.

My in-depth explanation for the defense needs to include all the thesaurus words for horrible:

1. Shockingly repellent: ghastly, grim, grisly, gruesome, hideous, horrid, lurid, macabre. . 2. Causing great horror: bloodcurdling, hair-raising, horrid, horrific, terrific. See FEAR. 3. Very bad: appalling, awful, dreadful, fearful, frightful, ghastly, horrendous, shocking, terrible.

"Shockingly repellent" is probably the best of these terms. ("I disagree. I look forward to seeing the Texans defense." Signed, Daunte Culpepper)

The offense still doesn't strike fear in anyone, but you can discern marginal improvement, even though they've just about always been behind, are seldom on the field and can't establish the run. David Carr is still having problems handling the snap and not fumbling the ball.

Texans special teams looks well coached and adequate. They don't have the return personnel that they would like, and I've heard rumors that Jerome Mathis' recovery from his broken foot may end up keeping him from playing all season.

The defense is shockingly repellent. The Texans had issues on defense coming into the season: 1. Transitioning from the 3-4 to the 4-3 with mostly personnel picked for the old scheme; and 2. Depending on mostly on old guys and rookies for key positions. That being said, NFL defenses, even with the thinnest of talent aren't suppose to result in your fans guessing in the fourth quarter whether the other team will put up 500 yards on you. Eagles put up 441. Colts put up 515. Redskins put up 495.

This is Richard Smith's first year being a solo defensive coordinator, and likely his last. He is not a disciple of a particular system, and has no long track record of success in coaching a specific type of scheme. In other words, uh, let's just say I am non-confident that he will be able to turn this around.