Press Questions: 9/27/2006

Welcome back to another session of Press Questions. In a perfect world, my job would be to be the Press Secretary for Eric Mangini. In said job, I would get to act as a lightning rod for the New York area media and make smarmy comments to the press as I answer the same dumb questions week after week. This set of questions are taken from Coach Mangini's Press Conference on 9/27/2006.

What's the situation with the offensive line going forward? Who's going to play left guard?

[Press Secretary Bassett] Well, it sure would be swell to put the guy who is a TEAM FREAKING CAPTAIN in there. Injuries have been an issue to our line, but Pete Kendall and Trey Teague are close to returning to work, they have been practicing off and on. We know what we will get from Adrian Jones (though we don't like it) and Wade Smith is working hard to make a transition to this unit. Going against a team like the Colts, we wouldn't have cut the guy who started the past two weeks without someone we felt who can step in and start ... just don't expect me to definitively tell you who that player is.

Is preparing for Manning different than preparing for Brady, and if so, how?

[Press Secretary Bassett] You really are getting paid to ask these questions? I feel like I am doing your Latin homework for you. Believe it or not, yes preparation would be different. Let's see, one has a cannon, the other doesn't. One has weapons at receiver, the other doesn't. One has a solid line, the other has a line that can get tripped up by the 3-4. One's best ability is to read the defense while limiting audibles and finding the open receiver from plays called by the O.C. while the other calls his own plays and even has the power to shoo the kicking unit off the field. One has three rings, the other doesn't. As a lesson to the student, I will let you figure out who's who.

[Does Coach Mangini] think that because [he was] a big part of the Patriots' success against Peyton, do you think just that fact will instill some confidence in the defense here?

[Press Secretary Bassett] Facts? What do facts have to do with anything? You want a fact? I read on the Internet that "the chief export of Chuck Norris is pain." That's a fact, look it up. So, the fact that Mangini was a part of the Pats, who had success against the Colts, does that inspire confidence? No.

As far as being a "big part" don't you think it might be a bit of an overstatement? The success came during the time that Romeo Crennel was the defensive coordinator. During the only game that Mangini guided the defense against the Colts, the Patriots allowed 40 points, 453 total yards, 28 first downs, 36:41 in possession, were 12/17 (70%) on third downs conversions, and allowed Reggie Wayne, Marvin Harrison & Edgerrin James all to go for over 100 yards. I'm not laying all the blame solely at Mangini's feet; he did have inferior defensive players last season. But to ask if there is some magical transitive power from working with the Patriots just kills me. No further questions.