Five Questions for an Enemy Blogger: Donko Edition

Thanks to the magic of flexible scheduling, we get to wait until this evening to renew our rivalry with one of our most hated old AFC West compatriots, the Denver Broncos. And when any Seahawk fan thinks of a match-up against the Broncos, they still break out in a cold sweat wondering if old #7 is lining up under center, which is why I went 'old school' with the accompanying graphic.

This week's enemy blogger is Gabe Stein from the Broncos FanHouse. Special appreciation to Alan from the 12 Seahawks Street blog, without whom there wouldn't be a Five Questions post this week, and to Gabe, who turned around his responses to these questions in less than 24 hours. That's why there's no reciprocal post this week.

Now, onto the Five Questions:

1. You do realize that your franchise savior, Jay Cutler, is from Vanderbilt, right? Vanderbilt. The biggest game this guy won was beating Middle Tennessee State last year to make the Commodores bowl eligible....oh wait, he lost that game.

GABE: Yes, we do realize that. He also had over 3000 yards passing and a 126 QB rating his senior year, on over 400 passing attempts in the best defensive conference in college football. And he did it all on his own, since he was, as you say, from Vanderbilt.

2. Its pretty much accepted fact that the Broncos offensive line plays dirty and likes to take shots at the opposition's knees. Do you also root for other criminals, like pushers and pimps?

GABE: Yes, I'm a big fan of crime, especially cut blocks and hitting defenseless receivers a la John Lynch. As both a pimp and a pusher, I'm proud to say that both are lucrative and fulfilling careers.

3. At many training camps teams will sponsor the NFL Experience or some other lame thing where five year olds get to kick field goals. Does yours include the activity "Rush for 1,000 yards behind our O-line...no football experience necessary"?

GABE: Yes. The problem is, we couldn't find any five year-olds who were willing to do it. Seriously though, I hope that this off season we'll draft a marquee back like Mauroney, our original first-round target until the deal for Cutler happened. We've definitely been hurt by not having a superstar back with an offensive line that's getting older and missing Alex Gibbs, and it's time to get another Clinton Portis or Terrell Davis...although even grabbing a decent back would probably do pretty well.

4. One of your biggest fans is, of course Barrel Man. How does it feel to be identified with a guy notorious for wearing nothing but a barrel when its -10 outside?

GABE: Don't even try to touch the Barrel Man. I want to see someone on your side do it just once next time it snows in Seattle like last Monday. In fact, if you want a challenge, come out here for tomorrow night and try it. We're supposed to have a low of 16, so this is a perfect opportunity.

5. We know how sensitive the Texas A&M folks got over the Seahawks use of the 12th Man name, so how do Bronco fans, still clinging to the memories of the John Elway oversized-teeth era feel about our rookie punter being nicknamed Gus the Mule?

GABE: Funny enough, the Broncos also have a 12th Man flag and schtick, it's just not as prominent as Seattle's. Anyways, I always refer to the Broncos as the donkeys when they suck, so the mule reference doesn't bother me much. Still, Elway did have some fangs.

Old School Rivalry BONUS Question: Who has the better car dealership, John Elway or former Seahawk Curt Warner?

GABE: I'm not familiar with Curt Warner's dealership, but it seems to me that in terms of marketing, 'John Elway' just rolls off the tongue better. Now, if you wanna go old school, let's talk about John Elway vs. John Elway AutoNation. Now that Elway is just the name and face of the dealership after selling it to the owner of the Miami Dolphins, I'm not sure...but I heard the old John Elway dealerships had pretty good service. Plus you used to get signed footballs when you bought a car. I don't know if they do that anymore - the only thing I really know about John Elway AutoNation is that they have very painfully adapted the Ghostbusters theme song in their commercials. "Who you gonna call? JOHN ELWAY!"