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Dex over at Gaslamp Ball did a great job playing oddsmaker and came up with a hilarious parlay card for the upcoming Padres season. Amongst the highlights, odds that:
Greg Maddux urinates on Tony Gwynn's new statue unveiled July 21, 2007
10. Before July 22, 2007 11. After July 22, 2007
Brian Giles penis "accidentally" exposed to the public
12. Before All-Star break 13. After All-Star break
Illegitimate children fathered by Clay Hensley
14. Under 1.5 15. Over 1.5First to appear in broadcast booth drunk (CIRCLE ONE)
20. Rick Sutcliffe 21. Bill Murray
22. Tim Flannery 24. David Wells
24. Jerry Coleman 25. Field (any other)
Let's see, I'll take 10, 13, 14 and 20. Of course if it were up to me, I'd include:
- David Wells waist line (in inches) over/under Trevor Hoffman's saves
- Jake Peavy airport arrests 26. under 2.5 27. over 2.5
- times "Jack Cust" and "prospect" are mentioned in same sentence 28. under 350 29. over 350
- ounces of cough syrup purchased by Padres from Terrence Kiel 30. under 15 31. over 15
Hmm, what else would belong on the card?
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