3 Climbers Perish While Scaling Mt. Everest; 2 Still Missing
Members Of Congress Speak Like High School Sophomores
When the Kansas City Royals swept the Detroit Tigers on the last weekend of the 2006 season, it clinched the AL Central for the Minnesota Twins. Since he's such a wonderful guy, Torii Hunter decided then and there that he would provide the Royals with a gift as a way of giving thanks.Little did anybody know just how far Hunter would go.
With a blatant disregard for human conduct and moral decency, Hunter delivered four bottles of Dom Perignon to the Royals clubhouse over the weekend. What a despicable act. Thankfully, baseball squashed this problem before it could get too far out of hand.
But baseball has rules about this sort of thing.
Namely, rule 21-b, which proclaims "Any player or person connected with a Club who shall offer or give any gift or reward to a player or person connected with another Club for services rendered ... in defeating or attempting to defeat a competing Club ... shall be declared ineligible for not less than three years."
The world also owes thanks to The Cheaters Guide to Baseball, who first reported Hunter's horrible lack of respect for the game. The commissioner's office then contacted the Twins about it, and they in return called the Royals behind it.
Luckily, the bottles had yet to be opened, saving us all from a champagne holocaust that could have killed billions.
Even though the crisis has been averted for now, baseball is still not finished deciding what to do with Hunter, who doesn't seem to understand the consequences of his actions.
"I do good things," he said, "If you want to make a good thing into a bad thing, then so be it."
Somebody lock this sociopath up!
Previously at the Fanhouse:
Torii Hunter Can Hold A Grudge
Torii Hunter Is Afraid of The Dark
WATCH: SpaceX Rocket Blasts Off Toward International Space Station
Booker 'Upset' By GOP Response To His Comments
Shots Fired As Thunder Fans Celebrate Win Over Lakers
UN Nuclear Chief Reaches Deal With Iran
WATCH: Chris Matthews Hammers Cory Booker Over Obama Criticisms
Gingrich Has A Warning For Team Obama
Romney Struggling To Respond Consistently To Attacks
Charles Ferguson: Understanding Pay-To-Play Academics
ONE YEAR LATER: Images Of Joplin's Recovery
Why's This Boxer Smiling?: He And 2,000 Wrongfully Convicted People Got Out Of Jail
SUPERSIZED MEALS: Nearly All Restaurant Entrees Exceed USDA Nutrition Recommendations
Train Crash Kills 24 In India
'Do You Want To Pay Now?': How A Hospital Hounded A Sick Patient
Is This The World's Favorite Web Browser?
Race To The Top Adds School Districts To U.S. Education Competition
N. Korea Ramps Up work At Nuke Site
Occupy Activists Declare Victory In Chicago
Rush Limbaugh Ratings Drop
Sen. Landrieu: Republicans Say 'In Private' They Support New Revenues In Debt Ceiling Deal
DEA Embroiled In Prostitution Scandal
'Syrian Prisons Are Human Slaughterhouses'
Goldman Sachs Looms As Rajat Gupta Fraud Trial Begins
