Retired Schumacher Passes Time Reenacting "24"

Michael Schumacher retired from Formula One in 2006 after a glorious career that left him peerless in the sport of open-wheel racing. How does the almost stereotypical European racecar wunderkind spend his days now? Apparently, its doing his best damn impression of Jack Bauer in the streets of Coburg, Germany.

Schumacher, 38, flew into the aerodrome at the Bavarian town of Coburg on Saturday and took a taxi to the village of Gehuelz, 30 kilometres away, to pick up a new puppy - an Australian Shepherd dog called "Ed". But when the former Formula One ace, plus his wife and two children, caught a taxi back to the airport they were short on time and, after a polite request, cab driver Tuncer Yilmaz watched in wonder as Schumacher took the wheel

We can just see him now, Nokia in hand exiting the airport, some kind of German Chloe on the other line bungling up the puppy information, and Schumacher screaming "THERE'S NO TIME!" Next thing you know, a nearby motortaxi is commandeered using nothing more than an ID card saying "I'm Michael !@#!$ing Schumacher," and the family is whipping around the Fatherland at French Connection speeds. Suffice to say, the family got their new puppy, and the taxi driver was tipped 100 Euros for the privilege of almost soiling himself several times on the trip.

(H/T: AFP and Yahoo Sports)