Coach Speak 101: Ohio State

Coach Speak is that magical language that all coaches use when talking with the media. No matter how grim the situation or how hated the rival in question, coaches can always fall back on this locker room dialect to speak about the subject in a way that will not offend the home fans or the rivals. Basically, it's a way to turn everything into sunshine and lollipops. As our own Brian Cook found out at the Big 10 media days, it can be a trial in frustration for reporters and bloggers alike.

But this twist on the English language isn't just for coaches. They've also passed along pointers to their players most likely to spend time in front of the reporters microphone. Luckily we have the translation of what they would say if free of inhibition.

Our subject is this article titled, Ohio State QB Boeckman watching Pryor's moves. Here are the translations of Boeckman and coach Jim Tressel speaking on freshman quarterback Terrelle Pryor.

"He's a special player, a special talent," Boeckman said on the second day of the Big Ten pre-season kickoff conference.

Translation: He thinks a lot of himself...a whole lot!

"I haven't seen what he can do on the field, so we're looking forward to seeing what he can do on Aug. 4."

Translation: I can't wait until Laurinaitis catches him running across the middle the first time. That'll shut him up.

"Going through 7-on-7 (drills), he's been asking me questions, how to do this, how to do that," Boeckman said. "It's been helpful, and beneficial, for him."

Translation: This is Todd Boeckman's team. Nothing happens out here unless Todd Boeckman says so. (Speaking of one's self in the third person is a variant of coach speak designed to let everyone know this person is crazy and won't be around long.)

Coach Jim Tressel had a few words on Boeckman and Pryor as well.

"I think Ohio State is important to him and he's going to lay it on the line for Ohio State," Tressel said. "He did it as an 18-year-old and he's doing now as a 35-year-old, or whatever he is. That's why you root for him so hard."

Translation: Boeckman isn't very fast, and I promised the world to Pryor to get him to sign with us. So I'm going to pull Todd at the first sign of trouble.

"We always say, regardless of the position or what year someone is, you get as your work deserves," he said. "If Terrelle deserves to rotate in at quarterback (he will). The only little difference is at quarterback, there's a rhythmic thing to work out."

Translation: We didn't have any choice but to use Boeckman last year. But this Pryor kid has the potential to make me look Mac Brown smart. The way Vince Young did.

So there you go. Understanding coach speak is a lot like reading between the lines. It's like Lennon said, "you look for the person who will benefit, and uh....I am the Walrus?" (**language alert on that link**)

*This post for entertainment purposes only and should not be taken literally.