Chad Javon Ocho Cinco Declares Himself 100% Healthy

Chad Javon Ocho Cinco is the NFL's Che Guevara. A revolutionary thinker whose interests are more moral than materialistic, except that, well, they're not. In any event, Ocho Cinco, who recently changed his name for strictly materialistic reasons, and also suffered a torn labrum during the preseason, has some encouraging words for anybody who'll listen:

As for the man formerly known as Chad Johnson, he only wanted to talk football and not about his name. He says his shoulder is 100 percent and he's ready to practice Monday for the first time since he tore his labrum 15 days ago.

"I've got a lot of making up to do to a lot of people," said Ocho Cinco, who indicated he prefers the media use his new legal name. "Not to just my teammates and coaches, (but) from the top all the way down. I pissed a lot of people off in the offseason. I've got to become completely focused. No distractions. I have to stay an attraction and be extraordinary in what I do."

Revolutionary, indeed. By the way, I love the fact that the media are honoring Mr. Ocho Cinco's wishes and calling him by his new legal name.

As to whether Chad's actually healthy is another matter. When not blogging, I dabble in the medical sciences (read: I own entire first seasons of Trapper, John, M.D. and Quincy, M.E.) and I'm pretty sure it's impossible to completely recover from a torn labrum in two weeks.

Maybe Ocho Cinco means that he's 100 percent healthy just as long as Carson Palmer and his broken honker don't throw passes higher than shoulder level. Otherwise, I'm guessing Chad is just bumping his gums for the cameras. Che would be proud.