Those Hot Dogs Are Gonna Blow!

I don't know about you, but I can tell the difference between a hot dog and a bomb. One of the two comes in many shapes and sizes, but there are usually a bunch of different colored wires, a clock, and an unmistakable ticking noise. The other is a tube filled with some kind of meat, a lot of sodium, fat, and nitrates, and can be found all over your local baseball stadium.

Now I've never been to Philadelphia's Citizens Bank Ballpark, but I'm pretty sure they sell hot dogs there. Which is why you would think the people there know what a hot dog is, and what it looks like, and could probably discern the difference between a hot dog and a bomb. Apparently we give the fine people of Philadelphia too much credit. From PHILLY.COM:

A Philadelphia Police Department bomb squad detonated three suspicious packages at Citizens Bank Park yesterday afternoon at 5, according to Phillies vice president Michael Stiles.

After the detonation, the area was given the all-clear and last night's Phillies-Braves game went on as scheduled at 7:05.

"It appears they're the same hot dogs the Phanatic uses to shoot into the crowd," one investigator said.

Thankfully, nobody was killed. This time.

Now, to be fair, if you put a hot dog in a microwave long enough, that sucker will explode. Still, it's not like they do a lot of damage when they do blow. They kind of just leave your microwave a mess, but it can be easily cleaned up afterward, and you generally don't need police assistance.