It's been a roller coaster ride this season for the Los Angeles Dodgers, and their real-life equivalents in the Dugout Chatroom have felt it. They were accused of being yokels from the past, they acquired and perverted one of the most popular players in the game, and they discussed at length Andre Ethier's "tINCFoUTaCU".

Tonight is the last Dugout of the Dodgers' 2008 campaign. It's like those episodes of Buffy that didn't really involve a monster and were just there to move along the season-long arc. Not dorky enough for you? It's like the Cowboy Bebop episodes without Vicious.

I guess it was dorky enough before. Tonight's Dugout is after the jump.

The Dugout

	DoctorProctor: /sits with head in hands
	PierrePants: /shrugs, angrily throws towel into locker
	DodgerrThePeacock: /bursts into room
	Torreumon: HE's HERE!
	DoctorProctor: yyyyyYEAH!!!
	Torreumon: /touches Peacock on arm It looks bad, Manny, the Phillies are up three games to one, but now that you're here, we've got a chance!
	Torreumon: Do the Peacock strut!
	DodgerrThePeacock: /nods
	Torreumon: On your feet boys! singingDODGERS! We're marching down the field! DODGERS! And we refuse to yield!
	DodgerrThePeacock: /does the Roger Rabbit
	DoctorProctor: TOUGHER! Because we're ROUGHER! We are the DODGERS! Of, L.A.!
	Torreumon: DODGERS! We're marching down... the... field... /notices asinine dancing
	DodgerrThePeacock: /does that Kid N' Play dance where you grab your leg and then jump through the hole you've made
	Torreumon: hey hey hey hey HEY! What the hell are you doing? That's not the Peacock Strut! THIS is the Peacock Strut! /sings, does the Chicken Tonight dance DODGERS! We're marching down the...what, did they rough you up or something?
	DodgerrThePeacock: /takes off helmet
	DodgerrThePeacock: I tried to save Manny, but I couldn't, we lost him to free agency!
	Torreumon: OH NO! What're we gonna do, he's the heart of our lineup! He's been having so much FUN lately!
	DodgerrThePeacock: I've got an idea! What if we...
	Online Host Welcome to the In Real Life Chatroom!
	EthierOr: ...and that's all I've got so far.
	EthierOr: The best idea I've come up with for the solution is "put Andre into cleanup, let him hit a walkoff homerun in extra innings"
	EthierOr: but that's a lot like my X-Files insertion fic where Mulder can't figure out where the ghost noises are coming from and has to ask new Special Agent Andre Ethier
	EthierOr: So, what do you think?
	maddux.xmission.com: haha it's pretty fresh so far, but the Dodger song wouldn't have them "marching down the field" because we don't really go "down the field" in baseball
	maddux.xmission.com: also, we don't have a mascot, but if we did I guarantee you he'd be named "Dodgerrr"
	EthierOr: or he'd be like, "Doubler the Dinozaur"
	maddux.xmission.com: "Equiavlent Average the Hoot Owl"
	EthierOr: lol "Baseball Term the Animal"
	maddux.xmission.com: hahah he would make our charitable event fun
	EthierOr: maybe if he shot T-shirts out of a gun we could keep people in the stands past the 7th inning
	maddux.xmission.com: yeah maybe people would cheer for us when we're losing if we had a Hoot Owl awarding pizzas
	EthierOr: hahah oh god that's so depressing
	maddux.xmission.com: I know, this has taken a depressing turn. In San Diego I think our mascot was Fred Flintstone.
	EthierOr: that was pretty cool of Joe to give us the day off, wasn't it? No batting practice, no infield.
	maddux.xmission.com: And you're using it to write "The L.A. Dodgers by Andy and Susan Borowitz?"
	EthierOr: It could be worse, Joe Beimel's been doing Myspace bulletins since six this morning. How many times do I have to read whether or not he's ever kissed someone whose named started with "B?"
	maddux.xmission.com: I don't know, has he?
	EthierOr: What, kissed a B? Yes, two of them. That's the only question he answers, too, everything else is "i duno" or "ummmmm..."
	maddux.xmission.com: why even do them, then
	EthierOr: I don't know, I've been more into Facebook lately anyway.
	maddux.xmission.com: what is Facebook
	EthierOr: "Additional Myspace"
	maddux.xmission.com: wait, what in the hell is a Myspace
	EthierOr: You don't know what a... wait, how old are you again?
	maddux.xmission.com: 401
	EthierOr: what? That's got to be an error.
	maddux.xmission.com: Oh, hey, I meant to ask you, are you going to the post-game party tomorrow? If we're out, it'll be our last night together as a team.
	maddux.xmission.com: Blake, Furcal, and Manny are all free agents, our entire farm system is loading onto a bus headed for Pittsburgh, and who knows how much longer I'll pitch.
	EthierOr: Yeah, def, sounds fun. Just let me finish up this story and we'll talk more about it.
	maddux.xmission.com: There's got to be a better use of your time. This is your day off, kid!
	EthierOr: /looks at window /looks at computer /print screens Youtube video of Fresh Prince for later use /looks at window Yeah, you're right. Let's go get a beer.
	Online Host The next night, after the game...
	EthierOr: /puts on jacket, fumbles around in pocket for car keys
	maddux.xmission.com: /walks through clubhouse Sucks, huh?
	EthierOr: /shrugs, finds car key on ring
	maddux.xmission.com: Hey, shake it off, kid, I've been here before. We'll be back next year. No matter where we are.
	EthierOr: /walks toward door
	maddux.xmission.com: Aren't you coming to the party? We did alright, man.
	EthierOr: Nah. No. No thanks. I don't really feel like it tonight.
	maddux.xmission.com: No big. You want to hang out, finish that story?
	EthierOr: Story's already finished.
	maddux.xmission.com: You wanna-
	EthierOr: Greg. /pauses, turns around Not tonight, man.
	maddux.xmission.com: ... okay. When's your next day off?
	EthierOr: /closes eyes
	EthierOr: Every day.
	Online Host EthierOr has closed the door on the 2008 Los Angeles Dodger Chatroom. Online Host Meanwhile, in another chatroom...
	MannyBoutTown: /sits down, takes off boa
	MannyBoutTown: /opens inbox ""From: Jonathan Papelbon To: Manny Ramirez (Evil) Subject: fwd: re: spies Message:
	MannyBoutTown: "hay many u never rite n e mor mom n dad r fine they say im growen up evryday the red sox is hangin in ther"
	MannyBoutTown: "i thot of a game calt spies n wanned 2 know if u wanet 2 play not sure how it works stil worken that out hit me back jus 2 chat truly you'res your bigges fan this is jon - pap"
	MannyBoutTown: /stares at screen
	MannyBoutTown: /stares a little longer
	MannyBoutTown: /turns off monitor

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