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Just when you thought this whole Plaxico Burress thing couldn't take another strange twist, it does. Earlier this morning, Will Brinson pointed out that Burress was spotted turning himself in to the proper authorities and walking without a limp -- something that seems quite odd considering he's not only out of the Giants lineup with a hamstring injury, but also just shot himself in the leg. Even stranger, the New York Post is reporting that soon after Burress shot himself in the leg, he spent a good 90 minutes trying to find a hospital that would, essentially, sweep this whole thing under the rug.
Granted, I'm not a professional athlete who is facing a potential three years in jail for shooting myself in the leg with an unlicensed gun, but my first instinct after shooting myself in the leg wouldn't be, "who's going to sweep this under the rug for me?" but, "holy crap, I just shot myself in the leg, somebody help me!"
But, again, I'm not Plaxico Burress. And, funny thing is, after Burress found a hospital that he deemed worthy of treating his self-inflicted wound, he wasn't Plaxico Burress, either. He was Harris Smith.
If you'll recall, before former-Falcons quarterback Michael Vick was serving time for running a dog-fighting ring, he was going by the name Ron Mexico attempting to cover up, well, a sex scandal of sorts. Since Burress wasn't in a big hurry to get himself checked into a hospital, he probably could have spent some time using his iPhone to look up the Ron Mexico name generator and come up with something a little more exciting than "Harris Smith."
For the record, my Ron Mexico name would be Duff Ukraine. Fellow FanHouse blogger Ryan Wilson, for example, would be Dante Thailand. Burress would be Sam Monaco. Harris Smith would be Kurt Poland. The more you know.
Anyway, if shooting himself in the leg, trying to find a hospital to discreetly treat him (the hospital didn't report the incident to the police, as they are required by law to do, according to the New York Post report) and giving a fake name wasn't enough for you, Smith, er, Burress, then told the hospital workers that the incident took place at an Applebee's restaurant.
For some reason, I'm guessing we still haven't heard the last of this.
(H/T PFT)
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