NFL Fines Darnell Dockett, Dwight Freeney $20,000 for Two Very Different Transgressions

Darnell Dockett might've missed his calling. After perpetrating the bucking bronco on teammate Antonio Smith following his Matt Ryan sack in the end zone for a safety, I'm convinced Dockett could've been the guy on the other end of a Shane Bacon-at-the-rodeo interview.

For now, Dockett seems quite content with his current gig, although the league was less impressed with him going "Men Without Hats" on Smith than those of us who love a little '80s Montreal pop with our football: the NFL fined him $20,000 and, just to show they don't have a sense of humor, they fined Smith -- who as best I can tell was the victim in all this -- ten grand.

I'll save you the "THIS DOESN'T EVEN MAKE SENSE!?" diatribe because, well, I'm tired of beating that drum, and I suspect you feel the same way. But I will just point this out: the Colts' Dwight Freeney was fined -- wait for it -- $20,000 for ripping the officials following Saturday's loss to the Chargers.

"Those were the worst [expletive] calls I've seen in a long time," he said. "To have a game of that magnitude taken out of your hands, it's just disgusting. It's not like they made one [expletive] bad call – it's three calls, in overtime. ... "

I can't say this enough: if the league really wants to curtail these disgusting acts, they need to arbitrarily mete out punishments. And the criminology literature agrees*.

* "agrees" = "couldn't disagree more."

Life in the No Fun League'

While celebrating a safety, Arizona's Darnell Docket (No. 90) jumped on the back of teammate Antonio Smith (No. 94) and rode him like a rodeo bronco. Dockett was fine $20,000. Click through to see more questionable NFL fines over the years.

Kevin Terrell, Getty Images

Culprit: Wes Welker
What He Did: Made a "Snow Angel" after scoring this Week 16 touchdown in wintry conditions versus Arizona.
NFL Fined Him: $10,000

Stephan Savoia, AP

Culprit: Shaun Ellis, New York Jets
What He Did: Chucked a large block of snow into the Seattle stands in retaliation for fans pelting New York's players with snowballs
NFL Fined Him: $10,000

Joe Robbins, Getty Images

Culprit: Benjamin Watson, New England Patriots
What He Did: Stuffed the ball up his jersey as an end zone tribute to his expectant wife and the couple's yet-to-be-born daughter
NFL Fined Him: $10,000

Otto Greule Jr, Getty Images

Culprit: Brandon Jones, Tennessee Titans
What He Did: Simulated an arrest during a touchdown celebration against the Jaguars
NFL Fined Him: $15,000

Doug Benc, Getty Images

Culprit: Ryan Clark, Pittsburgh Steelers
What He Did: Wore eye black with the No. 21 to honor his late Redskins teammate, Sean Taylor
NFL Fined Him: $5,000

Gene J. Puskar, AP

Culprit: Chris Johnson, Tennessee Titans
What He Did: Played the bongo drums on the sideline after a 66-yard TD run
NFL Fined Him: $10,000

Jamie Squire, Getty Images

Culprit: Ronnie Brown, Miami Dolphins
What He Did: Performed a choreographed "Cupid Shuffle" dance with teammates
NFL Fined Them: $10,000 each

Doug Benc, Getty Images

Culprit: Terrell Owens, Dallas Cowboys
What He Did: Mocked the Patriots' Spygate scandal by using the football to simulate a camera
NFL Fined Him: $7,500

Eliot J. Schechter, Getty Images

Culprit: Chad Johnson, Cincinnati Bengals
What He Did: Went through warm-ups before a game with an "Ocho Cinco" label on his jersey
NFL Fined Him: $5,000

Al Behrman, AP