Will the Real Stern Please Stand Up?

OK, the fact that David Stern did nothing to give us an NBA Finals with LeBron and Kobe is messing with my mind.

Admit it.

You're tripping, too.

For instance: With Kobe Bryant and his Los Angeles Lakers already in the Finals, all that LeBron James and his Cleveland Cavaliers had to do was conquer Dwight Howard and his Orlando Magic to create LeBron-Kobe.

No problem. The Stern Conspiracy Theories lived, because Howard is a Cavalier killer, and the Powers That Be whistled Howard for six technical fouls during the playoffs. One more 'T,' and Howard would be banished for a game under the rules. If nothing else, Howard would be playing gingerly to make LeBron-Kobe happen.
Except for one thing: The NBA reviewed the tape and rescinded Howard's last technical to help the Magic reach the Finals over the Cavaliers.

Huh? And how did the Los Angeles Clippers get those ping-pong balls to fall their way for the rights to Blake Griffin? Surely if Stern was still Stern, he wouldn't have allowed the league's most dysfunctional franchise to sit on the verge of acquiring such a splendid talent during this month's draft.

I mean, Griffin could revitalize the New York Knicks and their fans inside of the NBA's largest media market. Stern made it happen before.

Remember Patrick Ewing?

This is confusing for those of us who believe in second gunmen on grassy knolls and in Stern as the NBA's commissioner, grand pooh bah and secret manipulator. Is he under the weather? Or maybe he is on the verge of retiring after 25 years of transforming what was a dying pro league into one of the most vibrant ones ever.

You know, with Stern doing a little of this and a lot of that.

"I just never bought into this conspiracy stuff, because it's just people taking a shot at Stern," said Hubie Brown, the plain-speaking NBA analyst for ESPN and ABC. He also spent 15 years as a pro head coach, including two seasons that led to NBA Coach of the Year honors. Added Brown, over the phone on Tuesday from his Atlanta home, "Some take a shot at Stern because maybe their franchise was not awarded whatever, and that led to their conspiracy theories. You've got Stern and that draft-pick stuff they like to talk about. But, no, I was never big on any of that."

So Brown believes the following was coincidental when he coached the Knicks in 1985: The NBA invented the lottery that year, and his Knicks just (ahem) happened to win it for the first pick. They took Ewing, the national college player of the year, who became an 11-time All-Star, a member of the league's 50 greatest players team and the new Willis Reed.



Instead of ping-pong balls for the lottery back then, the NBA used envelopes. One by one, Stern yanked them from a large glass drum, and the first one was the lottery winner. According to many who watched the thing live from the site in (ahem) New York -- home of the NBA headquarters, by the way -- or later through replays on YouTube, one of the envelopes that Stern pulled from the drum was doctored to make sure he picked the right one.

The Knicks one.

"Listen. I never worried about any of that, mainly because I almost fell off my couch when I saw [former Knicks general manager] Dave DeBusschere [at the lottery] get the No. 1 pick," Brown said with a chuckle. "And, you know, people fail to go all the way back, because when Patrick first came into the league, he wasn't exactly what they thought he was. They thought he was a great shot blocker and a great rebounder. He didn't do either in his first year, but he did score over 20 points a game, which they said he could not do. He played up to the All-Star Game, but he missed over 30-something games, because he got an ACL [injury].

"Now once his body changed through the dedication of the workout people and the weight people, where he gained lower body strength, all of a sudden his performance went up in rebounding and shot blocking.

"So it's interesting to hear people talk [conspiracy]. For Patrick, for New York City and for the league itself. Yeah, it was a great thing."

It also was a great thing for the NBA in 2002, when the nationally obscure Sacramento Kings somehow dropped a potential series-clinching Game 6 against the star-filled Lakers. That "somehow" involved a slew of foul shots for the Lakers.

Even consumer advocate Ralph Nader sent a letter to Stern in the aftermath to complain of "notorious" officiating. Kobe Bryant used his elbow to strike the nose of the Kings' Mike Bibby near the end, but no foul was called. Not against Kobe or the Lakers when it counted the most. In contrast, the Lakers shot 27 free throws in the fourth quarter and scored 16 of their last 18 points from the line to force a Game 7.

Game 7s are more profitable to the NBA then Game 6s.

Bryant also is more profitable to the league than Bibby. And since Kobe also had the popular Shaquille O'Neal as a teammate, Stern likely wasn't displeased that those Lakers eventually won the world championship.

Years later, former NBA referee Tim Donaghy claimed that Game 6 was fixed and said officials in general were urged by the league not to call technicals on prominent players to keep stands filled and television ratings high. Stern denied Donaghy's claims, and consider, too, that Donaghy is a convicted felon after he confessed his role in what he contended was a massive gambling scandal.

Still, there were those Michael Jordan conspiracies. Pick one. They ranged from referees yawning or something as His Highness shoved away Bryon Russell to sink the NBA Finals-winning shot against Utah to Stern allegedly forcing Jordan into one of his retirements for gambling reasons.

What about the Boston Celtics getting Kevin Garnett for nothing and the Lakers getting Pau Gasol for nothing? Under this conspiracy theory, Stern worked in the shadows to make the old postseason days live again between Boston and Los Angeles.

All Brown knows is that prior to Stern's arrival as commissioner in January 1984, the NBA was a drug-infested, financially strapped, brawling disaster without a national television presence.

"He had this incredible vision where every one told him it would never happen," Brown said. "There were less than 10 people running the NBA office when he took over. At one time, they've had more than 1,000 people just in marketing around the world. He did clinics, because I was part of it, with Jack Ramsey and Calvin Murphy and Bill Walton. We went to 25 different countries where he sold the rights to television and marketing. So not only is he getting over $1 billion in television rights from ESPN, ABC and Turner, he's got the marketing worldwide, and he's the person who invented Dream Team I. I mean, all of these things.

"I don't understand these people who talk conspiracies. I really don't, because the man is so bright, and he's the only person ever to have this type of a vision and to sell it worldwide. I honestly feel that the guy never got the credit truly due to him. The marketing is in the billions of dollars per year.

"Why would he jeopardize all of that?"

Why did Jack Ruby shoot Lee Harvey Oswald?

Terence Moore is a national columnist and commentator for FanHouse. He is a frequent panelist on "Rome Is Burning," an ESPN show hosted by Jim Rome, that is seen Monday through Friday at 4:30 PM ET. Moore spent more than three decades working for major newspapers, including 26 years as an award-winning sports columnist for the San Francisco Examiner and the Atlanta Journal-Constitution. He resides in Atlanta.