WordUpThome: AND THEN I TOLD HIM THAT AMERICAN EXCEPTIONALISM WAS NOT A VALID PRECEPT OF FOREIGN POL

HarperImage: hey

WordUpThome: POLICY

WordUpThome: OH HELLO

WHAT IS YOUR NAME

HarperImage: bryce harper

HarperImage: how old are u guys?

WordUpThome: I AM ALMOST AS OLD AS THE SIX DAY WAR

HarperImage: o cool

HarperImage: my mom just gave me this screen name but i dont know what it means

HarperImage: she said its a reference to "sharper image" and that i would understand once i'm old enough to go to the mall

WordUpThome: WHEN WERE YOU BORN

HarperImage: 2003

WordUpThome: OK WELL THIS OLDEN CHAPERONE HAS TO REQUEST THAT YOU GET OUTSIDE OF HERE

HarperImage: why

WordUpThome: WELL THE SIMP

WordUpThome: SIMPLE ANSWER IS THAT THIS CHAT ROOM IS FULL OF CUSS-WORDING VAGABONDS

HarperImage: whats the complex answer

WordUpThome: CUSS WORDS

WordUpThome: IT'S ALL IRONIC, BUT YOU ARE NOT OLD ENOUGH TO APPRECIATE IRONY

WordUpThome: IT'S A "THE BIRD NEST OR THE EGG" CONUNDRUM

HarperImage: conan drum?

HarperImage: you mean max weinberg?

WordUpThome: HOW IN THE GOOFY GALAXY ARE YOU ALLOWED TO STAY UP LATE ENOUGH TO WATCH CONAN O'BRIEN

HarperImage: it comes on at 6:30 now

WordUpThome: TRUE

WordUpThome: REGARDLESS YOU SHOULD PROBABLY NOT READ ANYTHING IN THIS CHAT ROOM UNLESS YOU ARE OVER 45 YEARS OLD

HarperImage: well i can hit a home run 570 feet

WordUpThome: HOLY THEOLOGY

WordUpThome: I REALLY HOPE THAT YOU STAY ALIVE AND HIT BASEBALLS

HarperImage: yeah me too, my dad's letting me drop out before my junior year of high school

WordUpThome: WHAT

HarperImage: yeah

WordUpThome: OKAY HOLD THE FUDGE ON

WordUpThome:

WordUpThome: WELL

WordUpThome: I SUPPOSE THAT'S HONKEY-DO

WordUpThome: HONKEY-DOREY AS LONG AS YOU VALUE EDUCATION FOR THE REMAINDER OF YOUR LIFE

HarperImage: well my mom and dad filled me in on what i would have learned in my junior and senior years of high school

WordUpThome: AND WHAT IS THAT

HarperImage: a general understanding of logarithmic identities

HarperImage: a more substantial understanding of natural selection

HarperImage: the holocaust was really really horrible

HarperImage: william faulkner's "the sound and the fury" is borderline unreadable

HarperImage: f. scott's fitzgerald's "the great gatsby" is pretty good, but then you get toward the end and it's heartbreaking when the elder gatsby talks about his love for his son

HarperImage: you read kate chopin's "the awakening." you completely empathize with the female protagonist, but given that she has children, you can't help but view her backstroke into the ocean as selfish, despite the misogynisic, oppressive environment she lived in, and you aren't sure of what that says of you or your society as a whole

HarperImage: you read a toni morrison novel, and no matter how poignant it is, you still laugh at the name "milkman dead"

HarperImage: oh and also you learn that "their," "there," and "they're" are different expressions

WordUpThome: TRUE