In non-injury, non-exploitation, non-sleeping-with-Kate-Hudson related baseball news, the oldest living ballplayer, 103-year old Emilio Navarro, threw out the the ceremonial first pitch before the Oakland Athletics-San Diego Padres game on Saturday night as guest of the Padres for their annual salute to the Negro Leagues. That sounds a lot better than what the Cleveland Indians did last year, when they had "Negro Leagues Poster Night!" and it was like a 9 x 11 printout of a baseball sitting on dirt with the words NEGRO LEAGUES on it.

Oh, and before you say anything, I know Emilio got to go to high school (and was offered a spot playing in college, because he was/is awesome), I just titled tonight's Dugout like I did to continue our exploratory essays on how the easiest way to get into the bigs these days is to be the oldest or the youngest something.

Tonight's Dugout is after the jump.

The Dugout

	WordUpThome: SO I SAYS TO HIM, "AND AT THE RISK OF QUOTING TH' GOOD BOOK...
	WordUpThome: ISN'T IT ENOUGH TO SEE THAT THE GARDEN IS BEAUTIFUL WITHOUT HAVING TO BELIEVE THAT THERE ARE FAIRIES AT THE BOTTOM OF IT T
	OneInEmilio: hello, is anyone in there
	WordUpThome: TOO"
	WordUpThome: OH HELLO WHAT IS YOUR NAME
	OneInEmilio: Emilio Navarro
	OneInEmilio: how old are you kids? should you be using the internets without your parents permission
	WordUpThome: MY MOTHER HAS CONTRIBUTED MORE THAN ANY NAKED APE TO MY IMPRESSIVE COLLECTION OF BOOKED MARKS
	OneInEmilio: oh. I don't really know how to use this, my great great grandson set it up for me. Tells me I can use it to log on!
	WordUpThome: WHICH IS JUST CUTE OVERLOAD AND A .TXT FILE LISTING INTERNET MIMIS FOR THIS OLD NETDOG TO DISCOVER
	WordUpThome: THIS ONE IS CALLED "CARAMELLDANSEN," IT FEATURES POKAMON PICKACHU, LET US CLICK AND LEARN TOGETHER
	OneInEmilio: I think I might be too old for this
	WordUpThome: WHEN WERE YOU BORN
	OneInEmilio: 1905
	WordUpThome: THE HEY-DAY OF RONALD REAGAN-O-NOMICS IS A FINE TIME FOR BIRTH, NUMA NUMA DANCE STAR JOBA CHAMBERLAIN WAS ALSO BORN IN 1985
	OneInEmilio: No no no, not 1985, nineteen OH five.
	WordUpThome: OH
	WordUpThome: THAT WAS ALMOST 200 YEARS AGO HOW ARE YOU STILL LIVING
	OneInEmilio: I'm only 103, son, that's nowhere near 200.
	WordUpThome: ALMOST YOU ARE SO ALMOST THAT NOW I HAVE TO CALL YOU "EDWARD JAMES"
	OneInEmilio: how do I get to a google? Can I use this to get to a google? My grandson said that I should go to google
	WordUpThome: THIS YOUNG BUCK SUGGESTS THAT YOU "STOP HERE"
	OneInEmilio: why
	WordUpThome: WELL THE COM
	WordUpThome: COMPLEX ANSWER IS THAT A DOUBLE-DOE-DECOGENARIAN SUCH AS YOU AND YORN COULD NOT POSSIBLY COMPREHEND WHAT I REFER TO AS "CHAT ROOMS"
	WordUpThome: THE INTERPLAY OF CURRENT, COMMON KNOWLEDGES WITH NICHE HUMOR AND HYPERBOLIC CHARACTERIZATIONS MAKE EVERY CHAT AN IMPOSSIBLE JUMPING ON POINT
	WordUpThome: SO TO FULLY UNDERSTAND YOU'D HAVE TO GO BACK AND READ THEM ALL FROM THE BEGINNING
	WordUpThome: AND I HAVE SEEN CHATS FEATURING ALEXANDER CARTWRIGHT FROM BONANZA SO YOU'D HAVE TO FIND SOMEONE WHO WAS ALIVE IN 1845
	OneInEmilio: they had a internet in 1845?
	WordUpThome: YES BUT IT WAS MERELY A SERIES OF LENGTHY HORNS
	OneInEmilio: Is there a simple answer?
	WordUpThome: WE ARE JOYLESS AND OCCASIONALLY RACIST
	OneInEmilio: I know a little something about racism you big shaven snowman, I was the first Puero Rican to play in the Negro Leagues.
	WordUpThome: UH OH YOU AREN'T SUPPOSED TO CALL IT THAT
	OneInEmilio: What? Since when! They've always been called the Negro Leagues! It's not a slur!
	WordUpThome: BUD "MIKE CHIKLIS THE COMMISH" SELIG HAS SUGGESTED WE AVOID HURTFUL TERMS AND REFER TO THAT ORG AS "ENDARKENED BASEBALL."
	WordUpThome: THE SUGGESTION BEING THAT WE SHOULD TOTALLY FORGET SAD THINGS THAT HAVE HAPPENED IN THE PAST
	OneInEmilio: People will never forget! I threw out the first pitch at 103!
	WordUpThome: HOLY HORSE, HOW DID YOU DO
	OneInEmilio: I was only 25 feet away, but I got it to the catcher somewhat accurately!
	WordUpThome: THOSE ARE PRETTY GOODS, YOU ARE DOING BETTER THAN KLYE FARNSWORTH
	OneInEmilio: is he one of your young stars?
	WordUpThome: LOL
	WordUpThome: IF YOU PLAYED ENDARKENED BASEBALL THAT MEANS YOU FACED SUCH HARDSHIPS AS A REFUSAL OF CERTAIN SANDWICHES
	OneInEmilio: yes, hardships such as that
	OneInEmilio: But no, it was Heaven, Jim. I didn't have it so bad, I got to go to high school and I got an offer to play baseball at a university!
	WordUpThome: WHAT DID THEY TEACH YOU IN HIGH SCHOOL IN THE 1920'S
	OneInEmilio: They wrote the word "god" on the chalkboard and pointed to it until it was time for us to leave.
	OneInEmilio: sighhhhh, maybe I am too old for this
	OneInEmilio: what was that you were sayin' about going back to the first chats and reading them so I could understand what's going on
	WordUpThome: LUCKY FOR YOU WE HAVE THE WORLD'S OLDEST LIVING BALLPLAYER IN THIS CHAT ROOM
	OneInEmilio: /beams with pride
	MoyerBodyGirl: So, what do you need to know?
	OneInEmilio: aww. Well I-
	MoyerBodyGirl: GOD
	MoyerBodyGirl: please refer to the preceeding post for the answer to all of your questions
	WordUpThome: IT IS GOOD ADVICE

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The Dugout: Missed When You Weren't Allowed in High School Due to Racism

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The Dugout: Missed When You Weren't Allowed in High School Due to Racism

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Photos link to player info. (Photo Credit: Getty Images) WordUpThome.com

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