Andre Ethier does not want to take a picture with you. According to the Internet, Andre believes that people would use the photos against him on the Internet. He goes on to blame the hard economic times for making people want to do this. How many baseball players have felt the sting of a fan photo getting out, where an overweight lady (or whatever) is seen standing next to them while they are on the field in their baseball uniform? Did you see how happy she was? I bet they're dating! I bet he was out with her at Dodger Stadium, canoodling instead of playing baseball! As a person on the Internet, it is now my duty to talk about this. This morning's Dugout is after the jump.
The Dugout
 |
CunningStults: /holds camera at three-quarter overhead view, pouts lips, throws up peace sign |
|---|---|
 |
ClaytonBarrel: /fills out "100 questions survey" with only 38 questions that nobody could ever possibly want to read |
 |
MannyTheTorpedoes: /laughs maniacally at Winston the Cat |
| **Online Host** EthierOr has entered the chatroom. |
|
 |
EthierOr: hey fellas I was just out there on the field playing baseball and I thought you'd all like to.... /looks around |
|
EthierOr: Why is there so much Mountain Dew on the floor? And what's with all the Megan Fox posters? |
|
MannyTheTorpedoes: lol we was just enjoyin a internet, winson the gat, he eat up a sooshi an he love it so |
|
CunningStults: Andre, come here, I want to take a picture of you where it looks like we're gonna kiss, but not really! |
|
EthierOr: I don't do Facebook or Myspace, so no pictures. |
|
ClaytonBarrel: What? Why not? |
|
CunningStults: there's nothing more fun on the internet than momentarily reconnecting with someone, then not ever caring about them again |
|
EthierOr: It's all the blog things, The Dirty. The sports ones. You could be at dinner having a beer, and it could be, 'He was drinking at 2 in the morning.' |
|
EthierOr: In the profession you're in, it's more likely to happen to us than regular people. |
|
CunningStults: you mean "the normals" |
|
ClaytonBarrel: those who were born without souls |
|
EthierOr: Yes, I don't think it's necessary to share an image of my face with those people, who knows what they could do with it? |
|
CunningStults: they could take a picture of you drinking at 2 in the morning when you aren't supposed to and get you in trouble |
|
EthierOr: exactly |
|
ClaytonBarrel: and it is easier to be a dick to your fans than it is to be responsible and just not go out drinking at 2 in the morning |
|
EthierOr: exactly |
|
MannyTheTorpedoes: one tie i wake up in the middle o the night to get a drink o milk, an TMZ toog a pitcher |
|
MannyTheTorpedoes: two week later i was dating lady googa, what a crazy life |
|
EthierOr: besides, I think picture taking is unnecessary. Everything anybody does is filmed by camera crews anyway, so why would they want a still picture to use as a memory? Can't they just watch the tape? |
|
EthierOr: Can't they just be happy with me writing my name on their clothes in magic marker? |
|
MannyTheTorpedoes: i wrote "mannys room" on the logger room door an coach daddy suspented me |
|
ClaytonBarrel: if you like writing your name, maybe you should give "Myspace surveys" a crack! Check out this one I just filled out, it was fun |
|
ClaytonBarrel: 1. Have you ever found someone you really liked recently? 9. Will tomorrow be better than today? |
|
ClaytonBarrel: it goes on like this for several pages. |
|
EthierOr: how is anybody supposed to learn anything about you from that? You don't know the answer to any of the questions. Why did you fill out the questions if you didn't want to answer the questions? |
|
ClaytonBarrel: I enabled comments so hopefully people will tell me if it was good, so I can keep doin' em! |
|
MannyTheTorpedoes: /opens Myspace bulletin from Jonathan |
|
MannyTheTorpedoes: my space bulledin 1. do u wan play spies 2. what do spies do |
|
EthierOr: We're not in the business like actors that our face sells. It's our performance. It's your hot bat and your hot arm that keeps you on a team. I don't want my face out there. If it's the right time and place, I'll do it. |
|
ClaytonBarrel: uhhh I hope you don't mind but I just forwarded your comments to the blog "Don Sutton Has A Posse" |
|
EthierOr: That's fine, I guess |
|
ClaytonBarrel: yeah but then they farked it, and then it became farked, and somebody collegiately humored it, so now TMZ.com is reporting it as exclusive news |
|
MannyTheTorpedoes: i jess wanned a glass o milg /bursts into tears |
|
EthierOr: Is... is that bad? |
|
ClaytonBarrel: not especially, but now celebrity livejournal piss-filter "ohnotheydidnt" put up a post about it |
|
ClaytonBarrel: oh look, they put up a picture of you with a fan that makes it look like you are cheating with strippers while swimming in a vat of alcohol at 6 in the morning |
|
EthierOr: gulp |
|
EthierOr: oh no, I'm never going to outlive this... what are they saying about me? |
|
ClaytonBarrel: /skims 400 pages of "discussion" |
|
ClaytonBarrel: about a hundred people can't believe how spoiled professional athletes are, about 20 people who I think are guys are "ngl" about how hot you are, and everyone else is ignoring the topic to talk about whether or not they liked the transformers |
|
EthierOr: oh, so it's like every other day in L.A. |
|
ClaytonBarrel: and three different people expressed how they felt with this animated gif
|
|
MannyTheTorpedoes: i still can believe king o pap is ded :( |
|
MannyTheTorpedoes: wait hol on /references Myspace survey |
|
MannyTheTorpedoes: no questions 240-287 288. Are you dead? |
|
MannyTheTorpedoes: we shoul do a better job of chegging our sources |
|
EthierOr: I can't wait until you're done being suspended so we can all go back to doing nothing |
|
MannyTheTorpedoes: in the bulledin he says that he dk, does that mean he is dongy kong |
LIVE: NBA Finals Game 6
Obama Gives Speech At Historic Landmark
Michael Hastings Dies In Car Crash At Age 33
Report Highlights Climate-Poverty Link
Karzai Suspends Talks With U.S. Over Taliban Negotiations
Obama Defends NSA Programs
WATCH: Maddow's Moving Tribute To Michael Hastings
House Passes Major Anti-Abortion Bill
Protests Rage In Brazil's Largest City
Banks Caught In How Many Mortgage Settlement Violations?
GOP 2016 Contenders Test Swords In Immigration Debate
Food Stamps Mean $100 Million To Military Families
REPORTS: Patriots TE Questioned By Police In Murder Probe
GOP Education Fix Goes Too Far
Serena Makes Inflammatory Remarks About Steubenville Victim
'I Know Four People Who Have Been Shot'
House Committee Advances Immigration Bill Over Dem Objections
WATCH: FBI Releases New Video Of 2008 Times Square Bombing
Google Is Using The First Amendment To Push Back Against The NSA
Official Claims White House Wasn't Involved In IRS Scandal
Young Adults Want Health Insurance, Which Is Good News For Obamacare: Survey
4 U.S. Soldiers Killed In Attack On Afghanistan Air Base
Major City Closes In On Plastic Bag Ban
U.S. To Start Talks With Taliban
Huge Savings Predicted From Immigration Bill
Fineman: Bachmann's 'Got A Point' On Syria
Congressman To Challenge IRS In Court
LOOK: Iran's New President Makes Important Statement In New Tweet
U.S. Companies Lobbying Furiously To Save Tax Loopholes
