My Personal Issues With LeBron James

Brian Spaeth is a retired veteran of the NBA blogosphere, and the writer and star of Who Shot Mamba?, a full-length feature film based on his old website. It can be found all over the internet, and is also free on iTunes. Brian has published two novels, continues to blog at his personal site, and is an avid Twitter user. And, he is the author of the following post.

I was born and raised in Cleveland, as a Cleveland sports fan. I was therefore brought up with the embedded sense of sports-based doom and gloom you've read about for many years.

LeBron James brought a tangible change to this paradigm, for better or worse. Better, because there was hope. Worse, because there was real hope.

These are distinctly different things. None of us ever really believed the Indians would win the World Series in '97 -- not even when they were winning heading into the ninth inning.

But LeBron ... he brought something different.

You could touch it, and feel it, and dance to it, and be all like, "Wow, we have one of the most famous, talented, and charismatic athletes on Earth in our city. And he's from here. How nice."

Six years later and I've watched 95% of LeBron's games -- I've got a good feeling for the guy and his game.

These are my problems with him.

1) LeBron expects special treatment from everyone. The following is a 100 percent true story. I was at a basketball game at the University of Akron around the time when LeBron was in high school.

For whatever reason, he was there as a fan -- I think it was a playoff game or something.

Anyway, he went to the concession stand and asked for some free Cheetos, utilizing a "do you know who I am" ploy. They gave them to him, leaving everyone else without Cheetos.

This started a riot, and that's how I ended up with a small scar on my right elbow. I think about that scar a lot, and get sad when I do that.

2) LeBron only wants to win for the good of his brand. I was at a basketball game at the University of Akron around the time when LeBron was in high school, and for whatever reason he was there.

Anyway, he went to the concession stand I happened to be hanging around being cool at, and I asked him how long he stares into the mirror questioning his existence after a big loss. Not only did he not have an answer, but he thought such an exercise was funny.

3) LeBron won't post up. This is a bit of a non sequitur, but I was at a basketball game at the University of Akron around the time when LeBron was in high school, and he was there as a fan for some reason.

He wasn't posting anyone up at the concession stand, and was also bragging about how he would apparently be that way forever.

4) LeBron won't dance more, and he only does it in front of his own bench. I was at a basketball game at the University of Akron around the time when LeBron was in high school, and he was there, and he was dancing, and the paparazzi was going crazy about it.

I think we all know the lesson learned that day.

In conclusion, there's a "LeBron doesn't post up" joke in Chapter 2 of Who Shot Mamba?. Said joke was written THREE YEARS AGO -- read into that what you will. In even more of a conclusion, if someone could tell me what a non sequitur is, that would be amazing.

NBA HouseCast: On LeBron's Dancing, Simmons' Book, and Movie Making

In this edition of the podcast, Brian and I discuss the whole LeBron James dancing thing, Bill Simmons' Basketball Book, and how in the world he turned a bit on a basketball blog into a professional, full-length feature film. Check it out below, or download it here.



Who Shot Mamba? -- Chapter 5