Jose Reyes is going to start the 2010 season on the disabled list. So are the other 39 people on the 40-man roster of the New York Mets, because that is the only joke to make about them. The Mets are destined for another season of A-leaguers losing to the Marlins while the Yankees win the World Series, and it is all because of... well, nobody really knows what the cause is. Maybe it's the trainers. Maybe it's the players themselves. Maybe God regrets letting these guys beat the Orioles and the Pre-Crisis Red Sox in the World Series and is finally evening out the penance.

Today's Dugout travels to scenic Puerto Rico, where the Mets and Marlins will be playing a series this season. Maybe by then we'll have figured out what is wrong with Jose Reyes officially. My guess: a broken heart.

The 2010 Dugout Spring Training event continues, after what used to be the jump.

The Dugout

	Online Host Welcome to the New York Mets in Puerto Rico Spring Training 2010 Chatroom!
	Comerciante: Este poncho cuesta cinco dólares, cabeza del béisbol.
	MetLife: are you kidden me, este poncho no está digno de más de tres dólares, usted campesino puertorriqueño mudo.
	Comerciante: cinco dólares
	MetLife: god dammit lanzaré mi cabeza en usted en una alta velocidad
	Comerciante: usted juega para el Mets usted se romperá el brazo, o usted lanzará la bola en setenta kilómetros por hora
	MetLife: what
	Comerciante: cinco dólares
	MetLife: urghhh /pantomimes reaching into pocket, pulling out five dollars they told me you were spost to haggle prices in the marketplace in 10th grade spanish class, has my whole life been a lie
	Comerciante: No hablo inglés.
	MetLife: i hate you
	Online Host Meanwhile, in the Puerto Rican Doctors Office Chatroom...
	PuertoRicanDoctor: so what brings you to Puerto Rico, Mr. Reyes?
	ReyesAGoodMovie: the Mets that didn't die from dysentery over the offseason are playing a game against the Marlins here
	ReyesAGoodMovie: I see your office is built entirely out of clumped dirts and that we are knee-deep in week old standing water
	PuertoRicanDoctor: nice, isn't it give me a second to throw a blanket over this dead child and we'll have better health care than the United States
	ReyesAGoodMovie: maybe you can help me, I got up in the middle of the night to pee last season and stubbed my thyroid against the living room table
	ReyesAGoodMovie: now my thyroid is all unbalanced and I can't play any baseball
	PuertoRicanDoctor: hmmm. What did your trainer say?
	ReyesAGoodMovie: i don't know, you just covered him up with a blanket
	PuertoRicanDoctor: all right, I'll take a look at it... turn your head to the left, please
	ReyesAGoodMovie: /turns head
	PuertoRicanDoctor: okay, let's see that thyroid /jabs sharpened tongue depressor into ear
	ReyesAGoodMovie: ack, hold on a second, I think I'm blind
	ReyesAGoodMovie: no, wait, there it is wow i think i can hear the forest
	PuertoRicanDoctor: yeah, this definitely looks like an enraged thyroid, that could cause any number of problems from Keith Hernadez Disease to chronic unplaying
	ReyesAGoodMovie: Keith Hernandez Disease, what is that
	PuertoRicanDoctor: it is when chemicals are produced in the body that make you a f**king idiot who can't think properly or do anything right
	PuertoRicanDoctor: it can also turn your hair and beard gray
	ReyesAGoodMovie: oh no, can ladies get that
	PuertoRicanDoctor: No, it is just for men.
	PuertoRicanDoctor: let me take care of a few things here in the office and I'll write you a prescription /lifts blanket on drowned child, takes picture of child's junk, posts it on his Facebook
	PuertoRicanDoctor: wait a minute, is your leg broken?
	ReyesAGoodMovie: no? /moves leg around
	PuertoRicanDoctor: hold on, let me get a closer look /crushes Reyes' kneecap with butt of AK-47
	ReyesAGoodMovie: AHHH AHHHH /collapses into murky water, flails around helplessly
	PuertoRicanDoctor: that is definitely a broken leg, I will recommend you for the 162-day disabled list
	PuertoRicanDoctor: /leans in /makes backwards peace sign with fingers, puckers lips /takes picture