Five Ways China's Obama Club Is Like the President

SHANGHAI (April 27) -- The Obama Entertainment Club held its soft opening here Monday night, and at least one question about the new venue was immediately cleared up: It is not, alas, a "gentlemen's club," as VanityFair.com (among others) so juicily reported.

Other answers, though, proved more elusive. Such as: What's in a name? Queried, many of the club staff were unhelpful, appearing to never have heard of Obama (neither the American president, nor -- more curiously -- their place of employment).

But one plucky young hostess, Amy, offered this explanation for the very PR friendly moniker: "My boss spent some time in America, and he really likes Obama's slogan of 'Change'!"

Ken, a 30-something clubgoer and self-professed "friend of the owner," added that, "Chinese people love Obama very much" because "he is very famous!"

With that sorted out, your correspondent spent the rest of the festivities hunting for further displays of Obama-ness. It took some imagination, but by really straining, other links between Obama the president and Obama the club could be discerned:

1. INFRASTRUCTURE INVESTMENT

Obama the President: "From the first railroads to the Interstate Highway System, our nation has always been built to compete," said Obama during his first State of the Union speech in January. He's funneled billions toward everything from highway and bridge construction to Amtrak and has proposed spending billions more on infrastructure upgrades.

Obama the Club: For Shanghai nightspots, it takes a different kind of spending to compete, and the masterminds behind the Obama Club nightspot spared no expense on their lavish digs. Patrons are greeted upon arrival by two stone lion statues and an enormous outdoor fountain spouting in time to a piano ballad, which is cranked up so as to remain audible over the thumping base emanating from within Obama's lair. As they walk into the building, they meet a 3D frieze of gold-gilded female anatomy in the entryway.

If this sounds like sensory overload, there's more where that came from in the club's interior, which seems to have been inspired by the inside of a plasma lamp. The strobe lights strobe; the fog machines fog; and all the while six big screens display mesmerizing graphics that look as though they might have been borrowed from an iTunes audio visualizer.

It's worth noting that nothing about the decor is noticeably Obama themed, save for the golden "O" on each stall door in the ladies' room.

2. JOB-CREATION TRACK RECORD

Obama the President: After the U.S. economy added more than 160,000 jobs in March, Obama marked the occasion by saying, "All of us know how important work is -- not just for the paycheck, but for the peace of mind that comes with knowing you can provide for your family."

Obama the Club: On opening night alone, the venue provided gainful employment to DJ Coco Ariaz -- spinning some fierce house music, in keeping with the club promoters' exhortation to awaken the spirit of "IBIZA in my SOUL" -- as well as stilt-walkers, go-go dancers, and a giant human slinky. They were accompanied by a troupe of "angels" decked out in white sequined leotards, garters and pearls, who flitted about handing out glow sticks to revelers on the dance floor, and an opposing team of "devils," greased up, covered in pink body glitter, and giving off a definite bondage vibe, possibly due to the skull and bones adorning their crotch areas.

3. EFFECT ON RETAIL SPENDING

Obama the President: Free-spending consumers, who drove retail sails to their biggest jump in 11 years in March, are a key to a full recovery for the U.S. economy, and that recovery is key to Obama's political prospects. Following up on "Cash for Clunkers," his administration is running a "Cash for Appliances" program this spring. (Meanwhile, the stylish Mrs. Obama has been hailed as a one-woman bailout for an entire segment of the industry: "Can Michelle Obama Save Fashion Retailing?" asked the Time magazine headline.)

Obama the Club: The opening party was a coup for the textile industry, especially for manufacturers of the trucker hats and leopard-print mini-skirts sported by the mix of international and local beautiful people in attendance. Other big winners of the evening were manufacturers of Acgua di Gio cologne, fake eyelashes, and the Global Caucus of Indoor Sunglasses Wearers.

4. SUPPORT FOR AUTO INDUSTRY

Obama the President: To rescue the major American carmakers from the brink, the Obama White House put together bailout packages totaling $85 billion, two-thirds of which it expects to be paid back.

Obama the Club: The Obama Club parking lot was packed with Lexus, BMW and Mercedes models, plus a couple of Lincoln stretch town-cars available for those limousine liberals looking to travel home in style. Pickup trucks were in short supply, which would have pleased the president, who infamously made it clear that drivers of such vehicles score no style points with him, especially when they are named Scott Brown.

5. ENDORSEMENT OF ALTERNATIVE ENERGY

Obama the President: Seeing green energy as both an economic engine and a bulwark for national security, the president is pursuing a strategy that he has said "will move us from an economy that runs on fossil fuels and foreign oil to one that relies on homegrown fuels and clean energy."

Obama the Club: The eco-friendly crowd swilled Chivas by the bottle, Mumm champagne by the flute, and assorted other biofuels. When this diet began to seem unsustainable, they supplemented it with French fries and cantaloupe.