Russell Branyan's Toe Attacked By Hotel Room Table
Russell Branyan had a moment like that early Thursday morning. Branyan, who was just re-acquired by the Seattle Mariners in a trade a few weeks ago, was left out of the Mariners lineup on Thursday night because of a bad toe. A toe that was allegedly the victim of a vicious attack from a hotel room table.
According to his manager, Don Wakamatsu, Branyan went to close the curtains in his hotel room at 5 a.m. this morning when the table unleashed its attack. The table toppled over and landed on Branyan's toe, cutting it and bruising it before making off with Branyan's wallet.
Or more likely until Branyan said a naughty word, hopped around for a second and picked the table back up.
Now I don't want to call shenanigans on this story without knowing any more than what Wakamatsu is telling us, but I don't think the whole tale is being told here. I've been in a lot of hotel rooms in my life, and I have yet to find many tables in them that just fall over without some provocation.
Still, I'm not going to go into any details of what I think happened, preferring to let all of you use your imaginations and come up with your own theories.
Feel free to share them in the comments, though try to keep it PG.
Branyan, by the way, is expected to miss two days.