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The Dugout: Picked Up on Waivers

Aug 30, 2010 – 1:55 PM
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Brandon Stroud

Brandon Stroud %BloggerTitle%

I don't understand the waivers process. Don't bother explaining it to me, as a grown male I'm supposed to roll my eyes when people say they don't understand it. I really don't. So what, a team can choose whether or not to put you on something called waivers, and if you pass it, they get to keep you even though they could've just not put you on waivers... but while you're there, other teams can try to get you, but you don't have to go to them unless you want to, and then the team that put you on waivers has to be okay with that. But if both teams want you and no resolution can be found, the owners of the two teams participate in a series of camp events (go karts, a test of knowledge, etc.) with a "who can explain the infield fly rule to a lady fastest" tiebreaker. Right?

Oh I don't know. Manny Ramirez was put on waivers and the White Sox are probably going to get him. This is my interpretation of that news. Today's Dugout follows.

The Dugout

**Online Host**
Welcome to the Elysian Park Avenue Chatroom!

MannyTheTorpedoes: /stands on street corner wearing sandwich board, gorilla suit
MannyTheTorpedoes: /waves
**Online Host**
A car has passed MannyTheTorpedoes.
MannyTheTorpedoes: come in to watch dotchers play biesbol berry good gray price
MannyTheTorpedoes: /waves
**Online Host**
Another car has passed MannyTheTorpedoes.
MannyTheTorpedoes: forth play but still trine hard, come in an see dotchers
MannyTheTorpedoes: /waves
**Online Host**
A third car has driven past MannyTheTorpedoes.
MannyTheTorpedoes: sighhhh
OzzieOzzieOzzie: hey little man, what're you doing out here on the street corner?
MannyTheTorpedoes: the dotcher place me on wavers
MannyTheTorpedoes: /waves at passing car
MannyTheTorpedoes: l.a. sux i wish i still play for boson red sogs. they win championships an let me go number one in the outfeel
OzzieOzzieOzzie: /looks around to make sure nobody is watching
OzzieOzzieOzzie: Hey Manny, why don't you come play for MY team, Chicago! That sounds fun, right!
MannyTheTorpedoes: chicago red sogs?
OzzieOzzieOzzie: The White Sox! We're even better!
MannyTheTorpedoes: boson why sogs? but all players on boson red sogs are white....
OzzieOzzieOzzie: Here, look, candy! /brandishes Now and Laters
MannyTheTorpedoes: ooo nialaters
OzzieOzzieOzzie: You can have some if you just get in the back of my van ... /unwraps Now and Later
MannyTheTorpedoes: nialater nialater nilatersss nyah hee hee /totters toward van
TakeHamburglarToMcCourt: HOLD IT RIGHT THERE
OzzieOzzieOzzie: eep

TakeHamburglarToMcCourt: Give ME those Nihilators. I'm the one who put him on waivers, I deserve them! This is how revenue sharing works!

OzzieOzzieOzzie: I'm not trying to take him! I was just... trying to keep him from going to the Rays!
TakeHamburglarToMcCourt: I don't know what the Rays are, but I KNOW YOU'RE LYING!
TakeEveryoneToMcCourt: HOLD IT RIGHT THERE!
TakeHamburglarToMcCourt: eep
TakeEveryoneToMcCourt: According to my lawyers I am rightfully owed one half of any Nawlaters you get, and by "one half" they mean "three quarters," and by three quarters I mean all of your Nawlaters
TakeHamburglarToMcCourt: THESE ARE MY NIHILATORS YOU BITCH
OzzieOzzieOzzie: psst, c'mon, hurry up, we gotta go now
MannyTheTorpedoes: ok manny being vanny
**Online Host**
MannyTheTorpedoes has entered the Ozzie Guillen's Van Chatroom.
OzzieOzzieOzzie: whew, that was a close one.
MannyTheTorpedoes: hey these arnt nialaters this is jus stale starburse
OzzieOzzieOzzie: You excited about going to Chicago??
MannyTheTorpedoes: CAGO WHY SOGS CAGO WHY SOGSSSS /jumps up and down
OzzieOzzieOzzie: What's the first thing you're gonna do when you get there?
MannyTheTorpedoes: play rly good then stop, hate u an take ur monies
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