British Couple Learn the Ins and Outs of Reviewing Sex Toys

Prince William and Kate Middleton have a royal wedding to plan, but they aren't the only British couple keeping busy these days.

Steph and Mel Teague also have their hands full, but in a slightly different way: Their hands are filled with sex toys.

The Teagues, of Birmingham, have just won a nationwide contest in Britain to become sex-toy reviewers for Your Pleasure Zone, an online and mail order retailer of adult products.

Steph Teague

Steph and Mel Teague recently won a nationwide contest in Great Britain to become sex-toy reviewers. The couple, who have been together seven years and married for one, plan to take their work very seriously.

As part of their job description, the couple will be paid to review a different sex toy every week, including a three-minute video review of the toy, which will be broadcast on the company's online TV channel.

Products that get a "7" on the site's 10-point orgasm scale will be added to the company's inventory.

As might be expected, the couple is excited by the possibilities. Or maybe they're just excited -- period.

"I was on the Your Pleasure Zone website looking for some naughty underwear for a weekend away and saw the advert for the competition," Steph Teague said. "I thought it looked like fun so we applied. But we never expected to actually win."

According to the press release -- and this is an exact quote -- the Teagues "beat off fierce competition from hundreds of other horny British couples to win what the company describes as 'the world's most enjoyable job.' "

Actually, spokesman Nick Gibbens admits only 93 couples entered and the competition -- which was stiff -- came down to the Teagues and a couple from Brighton.

But the Teagues ended up with a whopping 60 percent of the vote and the chance to rub elbows, among other things, with greatness.

"We want a knowledgeable couple to test out our range of sex toys and make sure they are good enough for our customers," Gibbens told AOL News. "If Steph and Mel give them a poor orgasm score, then we will think twice about stocking them."

For her part, Steph is up for a challenge and believes she has what it takes.

"I think we made the cut because we are both quite outgoing, outspoken and a bit cheeky," she told AOL News. "We have a good sense of humor, which I think we will need."

By day, Mel, 41, is a plasterer and Steph is a photographer. However, her resume seems to have been great preparation for her duties as a sex-toy reviewer: She's worked as a stripper, lube wrestler, pole dancing teacher, radio "sexpert" and magazine editor.

So which of those jobs helped the most?

"I think maybe a little of all of them," she said. "You have to be a particular sort of person to do all of those types of jobs and all of those are incorporated in this one. It requires not only a solid relationship but, as an individual, I need to be confident with my body and also have a good writing ability."

It's only been a short time, but already important lessons have rubbed off on the Teagues.

"Finding the time to do it is harder than we thought it would be," she said. "It makes us realize that there must be a lot of couples who can't find the time for each other. Every couple should find the time to set aside a bit of 'naughty' time for each other."

Even more important, she says, is what she's learned about sex toys: "You can never have too many batteries handy."

San Francisco sex educator Dr. Sadie Allison, who has been in the same position as the Teagues (and probably a few others as well), advises the couple to take their raunchy responsibilities seriously.

"It's best to categorize the toys by type," she said. "And try to hold off on orgasming until the end, because that wouldn't be fair to the toys you test afterwards."

Although the Teagues are ready and willing to do their bit as sex-toy reviewers, they are temporarily unable.

It seems Mel just crashed his motorcycle into a van and suffered whiplash, bruised ribs and a bad ankle.