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If David Stern Rules the NBA Lottery

By theory, the NBA Draft Lottery (tonight at 7:30 p.m. Eastern) is left to randomness. But what if, as the conspiracy-minded have insisted for more than two decades, David Stern dictated the results? Close your eyes and imagine such a world ...#1 Pick: New York Knicks. No explanation is needed here.#2 Pick: Charlotte...

If Malevolent Basketball Gods Rule the Lottery

By theory, the NBA Draft Lottery (tonight at 7:30 p.m. Eastern) is left to randomness. But what if a set of malevolent Basketball Gods, hellbent on upsetting the Order of the League, driving the depressed into further hopelessness, and rewarding only those with misguided or evil intentions, dictated the results? (Note:...

If Karma Rules the NBA Draft Lottery

By theory, the NBA Draft Lottery (tonight at 7:30 p.m. Eastern) is left to randomness. But what if basketball karma dictated the results? Close your eyes and imagine such a world ...#1 Pick: New York Knicks. James Dolan has done everything (other than self-flagellation) required by the karmic standard to rectify the...

NBA Frankenstein: Kevin Love

FanHouse's NBA Frankenstein, in which we describe how draft prospects were created. Introducing: charter member of The Fat Backstreet Boys Kevin Love.Liner notes: Chad Ford's dispatch from Camp Abunassar; the Survivor catalog; the visitors log book from Tom Cruise's secluded ranch; UCLA's NCAA second round game against...

NBA Frankenstein: Robin Lopez

FanHouse's NBA Frankenstein, in which we describe how draft prospects were created. Introducing: lesser of two weevils Robin Lopez.Liner notes: An epic YouTube; the slam poetry of Jarron Collins; the most disturbing Sports Illustrated profile in at least two years; Ty Keenan's irrepressible Pac-10 Basketball knowledge;...