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The Dugout: A Perfect Game

This morning, White Sox pitcher Mark Buerhle drank sangria in the park. He fed animals in the zoo, then later, a movie too, and then home. Just a perfect day. And he finished it with a single pitch. Do they give peabody awards for sports blog intros? They should, because the next line is going to be presented by itself, so...

The Dugout: The White Sox's Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

The White Sox experienced an awful Thursday. They were beaten 20-1, their most lopsided loss in history, by the Twins. Worse, their plans to acquire one of the best pitchers in baseball, Jake Peavy, were dashed. Things were so bad that I felt it appropriate to post a picture of a non-smiling Jim Thome. It took me a while...

The Dugout: In Celebration of Ray Shook

On April 16th, 1916, Ray Shook suited up for the Chicago White Sox ... or so they say. I invite you to take a look at his career statistics. If the statistics are to be believed, Ray Shook played one career game, but made zero plate appearances. To boot, he did not pitch, and he did not field. Perhaps he was brought in as...

The Dugout: Opening Day

There is no greater time than the beginning of baseball season, especially when you write for a sports blog and you happen to be so beloved by the Christian God that he manipulates the happenstance of professional sports to make your feature better. That's exactly what happened today, when the Kansas City Royals opened up...

The Dugout: The Guille-tine

According to insider reports, Ozzie Guillen knows how he wants to die: on the field, mid-pitching change. He wants to die, be dragged off the field, and replaced instantaneously. In equally important news, the sky is blue and Kyle Farnsworth's favorite food is "hamburgers."But no Ozzie sentence can go unanalyzed, so here...